I am honestly amazed by how proud, people have become...
Social class (with it, proud and arrogance) has become such
a way of life that people tend to think it is the only way for them to survive.
It could be a shield used to protect who they truly are inside, who knows? But
confidence is indeed very different from pride.
Those who are comfortable in life are worst – always
comparing themselves to others, constantly complaining and lawyers get the
trophy for such. Most of my lawyer friends have so much pride, it is
unbelievable. My friend Edward Kasaine, is however the complete opposite and
yes he is a lawyer. Edy is simply a wonderful, down to earth person and oh how
could I forget? Mr. X, my bad.
Mr. X (who does not want his name to be mentioned) is an
amazing man. What makes him different is that he is a lawyer who once a week
dress differently, goes in the streets, seat with the unemployed in the Nairobi
‘jobless corner’ and listen to their problems.
‘God says when you are humble you
are free from pride and arrogance.’ Unfortunately
pride is built from a very early age and I completely blame the parents for
that. Parents are working so hard to provide for their children and give them
the very best if not everything they themselves lacked that they forget the
basic necessity of life- necessities that are much higher than what money can buy
and which will be remembered long after the money is gone: wisdom, humility,
kindness, politeness, respect are some of the many virtues parents should
inculcate in a child.
I grew
up in a very affluent family and yes I was spoilt. I had everything I wanted,
had my own house girl whose job was well hilarious, she would go to the kitchen
and get me some water when asked, while my 16 years old butt would be
comfortable in the couch watching TV simply because of some superstitions
created by West Africans and trust me you don’t want to go there.
Despite
having all I needed, my parents (mother and grandmother mostly) taught me the
importance of respect from a very early age. I remember the day I referred to
our local man selling charcoal as ‘charcoal man’; the lesson I got, was
something I will never forget. I was 12 then if I am not wrong; my mother
ordered me down, looked at me straight into my eyes and asked me why I was referring
to him as such yet he had a name.
‘I
don’t know his name,’ was my answer
‘Have
you ever asked him?’ Was her reply
‘That
is how everybody else calls him and…. he sells charcoal’ I continued
‘Should
you be called useless just because you don’t work, live under my roof, eat my
food?
How would you feel if someone referred you by what you do especially if
you are less privileged?’
You can
guess what my answer was. Yap silence.
‘Just
because he sells charcoal, she continued ‘doesn’t make him anything less or give you
the right to call him the way you do, he has a name so go find out what it is,
if he is married and if he has any children you can play with’
‘Me?
Play with his children?’
Well I
wished I had not asked that question because there and then, for the first
time, I knew I needed to fear my mother.
The love of my life, my mother
I
remember seeing my grandfather who then a Mayor, would seat with Mohammed ‘the
charcoal man real name’ or the kiosk lady and have various discussion or my
uncle a diplomat, have tea with the watchman. I remember seeing my mother and
grandmother cooking every week for the less fortunate and sharing the food in
the Mosque, Church and in the street. I remember telling myself that this is
how I wanted to be and with each passing year, my desire was higher. My
grandfather passed away in 1996 and it is amazing how more than 10years later,
when someone introduces me as his granddaughter, they cry and tell me how kind
hearted he was and all the things he did for his community.
I have
a very close friend whose father is a Minister in the Kenyan Government. We are so closed that the first time I found
out whose child he was, I could barely believe it and most Kenyans would know
what I am referring to. This is a man when we would travel and would not have
enough space for everyone to sleep, he would make sure everyone was comfortable
and sleep on the floor. Remember his father is a Minister...
He uses public
transport/ matatu as locally referred to, yet many are his cars.
The most amazing
thing he ever did for me was during a group trip we had. We ended spending more
days than previously planned at the location. We all looked dirty, smelled bad-
horrible trip it was. Our car broke down one day before our return to Nairobi
and there was no water yet the following day I was to attend a meeting and my
clothes were all dirty. I don’t know
where he found the water from and much less the time to wash my clothes yet we all
slept at midnight that day; but he did so. His siblings are all similar; these indeed
reflect the kind of education he received.
‘’The reward for humility and fear of the Lord
is riches and honor and life.’’ Proverbs 22:4
Parents
need to understand how easy it is for a child to be negatively influenced. More
than anything else, it is the little action you display as a parent that
influences your child. Your action as a parent can affect the way your child
will behave and how he/she will become. At the rate the world is going, don’t bring in
a child similar or worst to what we are witnessing but bring up someone who
will positively influence and lead others and make this world a better place.
Beside
life can take such unexpected turns that you will realize later the importance
of humility like I did when we lost most of our wealth….I thank GOD however
because my siblings and I always remained humble with or without the money. I sincerely
thank GOD for the family HE gave me.
